Are you in love?

Surveys are back!

I've found new inspiration to work on my books and get them done. I don't know how long it will last, but I've been inspired to keep doing more surveys, perhaps rehashing some of the old topics, but trying them in a new location.

The results

This is the most data I've gotten so far, because I found a good spot where there's significantly more people. So I filled both the front and back up with the same question.

Unfortunately, that also means there was far less conversation opportunities, so most people simply answered, and nobody really posed any deep responses to the question. So I guess this means that spot is better for quantity over quality.

I am convinced that the data is skewed, because at least half of those who put Yes were couples walking together. It must have seemed like a little romantic side quest to put Yes. But I imagine a number of them were really Maybe, and possibly some of them were Yes for one person and No/Maybe for the other.

Two or three separate black people said "Hell naw!" hours apart.

Two or three people who put Yes said "I'm in love with Jesus!"

Two or three people who put Yes said "I'm in love with myself."

A good number of couples looked at the sign and didn't smile, didn't say anything, just read it and walked by. I can't help but wonder how many unhappy relationships I just ended by putting the question in front of them that they were trying not to think about.

Among the couples that walked by looking fairly miserable, sometimes reading my sign and sometimes not, but never smiling or looking the slightest bit happy, were that type where the guy goes to the gym way too much and tries so hard to look badass, and the woman is wearing a dress and way too much makeup. I feel so sad for such people.

One man said "No," and sarcastically added, "thanks for reminding me." I wonder how many people didn't answer because their answer is No and reading it just made them sad.

A few people asked why I'm doing it, and I made the joke that I'm trying to find love. I said "what easier way can you ask a thousand beautiful women if they have a boyfriend while aura farming?" Technically it was Sunday, and as a Catholic, I can't work on Sunday, so I didn't tell anyone I was doing it for my book until I did it again this morning.

Very near the end of the survey, someone added another category "I don't believe in love" in order to see who else would add it, but I was too tired to continue the survey Sunday night. I did it for another 30 minutes this morning (Monday) but most people were on their way to work and looked like zombies, and most didn't even glance at my sign, let alone take the survey. I did get a few more answers though.

I wanted to do it by the bars at River North after 9pm, but I was so tired from such a long weekend that I went straight to sleep. I really want to do a survey by the bars one of these weekends.

Interpretation

About 3/4 of people are in love! If you include all the Maybes, it's almost everyone!...

But like I said above, the data seems skewed.

I feel like we can say perhaps a third of the Yes (-275) were invalid and should mostly be added to Maybe (+200) and some to No (+75).

The new table would then be:

Considering the question is whether you're currently in love with someone romantically, I think this looks more reasonable and less unlikely. Still skewed though, because there ought to be more No's. But assuming it's close enough for now...

About 3/4 of the world is in currently love! As a friend said to me, "Love wins", and I'm not very surprised. People are naturally meant to be with someone. That doesn't mean it's for everyone. Some people are meant to be alone. And some people are not ready to find someone. And some people are having a hard time finding someone. But most of us want to be with someone, to love and be loved.

What is love?

How do you know if you're in love? I mean, what is love? (Baby don't hurt me.)

You can have a crush, you can be infatuated, you can even have an obsession with someone (wait, "say that again?") and then I ask, are these all legitimate love, even if they're fleeting or immature? Is it perhaps a budding of new love, though it might die young?

I went on a date with someone a month ago who told me she sees no difference between lust and love. Needless to say, that was the last date I went on with her. As a Catholic, I would have to make a philosophical separation between physical intimacy and love.

Is an elderly couple on their deathbeds still deeply in love, even though they can barely hold hands anymore? Was it physical intimacy that cemented their love for all those decades, or did their love produce the physical intimacy, or did the dynamic go in both directions?

How often do people simply settle for someone they can tolerate, because they'd rather not be alone, and have someone to share their experiences with, their hopes and dreams, their worries and fears? Is that not real love, though? Or at least, can it not become real love?

What constitutes romantic love? Loyalty and fidelity? Physical attraction and desire? Having common interests? Sharing the same tastes in art and culture, food and music, humor and entertainment?

Let me know what you think in the comments below!